She thought it would be different with me and she tried and obliged every time I wanted sex, but I could tell that she was not enjoying it. This of course destroyed my self esteem, and I started to feel guilty every time I "forced" her to have sex.As the months past our sex became less and less regular and I became more and more insecure. This insecurity led to my jealousy, which raged as I knew that Linda was careless with her modesty and that my colleagues and other men at work got to perv the same as I had. I tried to raise Linda's awareness of how a "lady" should walk around in public, trying to get her to wear longer dresses and petticoats, but my casual suggestions were scoffed off as she found the idea that men would deliberately try to look up her skirt, down her top or get turned on by being able to see the silhouette of her body through dress, ludicrous. This led to my comments becoming less subtle and my accusations of exhibitionism more insulting. This had the obvious. He said it was for my own good and told me never to talk to anyone about it. I said I wouldn’t, but he wasn’t convinced. He dragged me from my room to his and made me bend over on his bed and put my face down in his pillow to muffle my cries. Then he held my head and hit me on my butt with Mom’s hair brush. He asked me several times if I would tell anyone and, each time I said no, he hit me anyway. I was sure he could hear me, but it didn’t matter.“He made me take off all my clothes. Then he took off his clothes and told me to hold his erect penis and rub it with my two hands. I was scared and didn’t want to. He told me if I didn’t, he would make me go naked in the house for a whole week.“This happened almost every month, sometimes twice, especially when he didn’t have to go to work on Saturdays. The first several times, he would come to my room late at night while I was sleeping, wake me, grab me by the hair, and then drag me to his room. After a while, I already knew what he wanted.
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